born to expire

Today i had my first re-admit and "expiration" of one of my patients. I was lucky enough to have Dr. Chu with me that night. He pretty much did most of the work. I felt totally clueless as to what i am suppose to do with a dead body. Well, there are taking tubes out of the remaining physical body, calling the family and informin them that their loved one has passed away, comforting the family member(s) that are present at the facility, calling to the pharmacy to stop all deliveries for their medication, tagging the ankle with their name and last name & calling the mortuary for the body pick up. Signing a death certificate is a weird experience. It was hard to see the son tell me that it was his fault and that he didnt want to see his father suffer anymore and just "go". I held in my tears and because i didnt cry, he told me that i was tough and thanked me for being a form of strength for him... hmmm. Definitely not easy to hold your sorrow in. Just to put it out there, Im not numb to things like that. but this was something i had to get used to. especially it being part of my job.